LOS ANGELES, California?He says things like: "Daniel Craig is a challenge to my heterosexuality. If I knew I was about to die, I'd be out there chatting up Daniel Craig. I'm going to give him such a big cuddle, that man. I could be a vicious Bond girl!"

Get ready for Russell Brand, who is dubbed the randiest man in show biz in the UK. He's famous in his country as a stand-up comic, newspaper columnist, television and radio host and book author. And now as an actor in an American comedy movie, "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," Russell is poised to become popular as well in the US and the rest of the world.

Playing an egotistical, hedonistic British rock star, Aldous Snow, Russell parlays his raunchy rock 'n' roll image onto the big screen, engaging in hilariously acrobatic sex scenes with Kristen Bell (TV's "Heroes"), who plays the title character. Produced by Judd Apatow ("The 40-Year-Old-Virgin," "Knocked Up"), "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" tells the story of a musician (Jason Segel) who vacations in Hawaii to recover from being dumped by his TV star girlfriend, only to find that she and her new rocker boyfriend are also in the same resort.

Russell is only 32 but has already written an acclaimed autobiography, "My Booky Wook," where he chronicled his troubled young life, including his bouts with drug and sex addiction. He was only 3 when his parents split. At 17, Russell took a trip with his father to the Far East, where they bonded by sharing a room with prostitutes. He also narrated how a spat with a female stripper at dawn led to his being locked out of his house ... and he's naked. In search of a locksmith at three in the morning, he wandered, still nude, into a gay bar.

In his review of the book, the Guardian's Andrew Anthony wrote, "To his (Russell's) expanding CV (curriculum vitae) can now be added a scandalous, libidinous memoir that is better written and more entertaining than any number of the celebrity autobiographies that clog the shelves of our bookshops." "My Booky Wook," which recently made it as a nominee in the biography category of the British Book Awards, will be made into a film, with Russell playing himself.

Now reportedly free of his drug and sexual addiction, Russell, a vegetarian who practices yoga, juggles being a live show performer, BBC Radio and MTV host, journalist and now, a film actor. The eyeliner-wearing Brit was even invited to speak at Oxford late last year.

At the press con, Russell was a hoot, speaking in a courtly manner while talking about stuff like his genitals. But his erudition showed - it's very rare to come across a celebrity who casually says words like "quotidian" and "inveigled."

Wearing what he described as "baubles and trinkets," Russell had the reporters of various nationalities laughing almost with every sentence he uttered. So please note, in these excerpts, Russell delivered one quotable quote after another in a tongue-in-cheek manner. Read them in the press con's humorous context.

You are quite a celebrity in the UK-everybody was writing about your book there-and yet you are little known in this country.

I'm absolutely obscure. I'm unknown. I can go through towns unobserved, unnoticed like a shadow man and may I tell you that it's very bruising for my ego.

Was Daniel Craig a good sport when you kissed him on a TV talk show? After all, he's 007, James Bond.

And I successfully eroticized Daniel Craig.

Did it take much courage?

It didn't take much work because he's quite erotic anyway, playing 007 with all that innate sexuality, suppressed violence and intrigue. The sexuality merely needed to be teased.

Was there any reason you never mentioned your Hollywood foray on that show?

I didn't mention it because we English do not like to appear arrogant or conceited ... I didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings so I politely declined to mention it and instead spoke of my vegetarianism and my love of art.

Did you feel like a fish out of water when you were in Hawaii?

I don't know how a fish out of water would feel. I imagine it would feel an incredible obligation to return to its natural aquatic state. What I felt was being ostracized certainly by my own countrymen and a sudden sense of bereavement for the lack of sexual opportunities. To be denied orgasms is a challenge but well worth it to appear in this fantastic film ...

What did you miss?

Sex. The gaslights, the cobbled streets, the English newspapers.

Can you talk about how you and Kristen Bell prepared for those acrobatic sex scenes?

We obviously had to familiarize ourselves with each other on account of the intimacy of those scenes. While people in London seemed very excited about the opportunity I was afforded - being in such proximity to a beautiful actress like Kristen Bell - I was very nervous because you're surrounded by burly teamsters and intimidating men. Your attitude toward your own genitalia dramatically changes. Also, the male genitalia is not an organ that responds particularly well to lights and focus.

What's more, they made me wear flesh-colored pants [actually a pouch] which I can only describe as being the color of prosthetic limbs and they cover my genitalia. They compromised my dignity but I'm expected to perform sex acts. I didn't want to let down my nation which is England so I thought that it was very important that I looked sexually dexterous. That further heaped pressure on me. I must say that Kristen was incredibly patient and tolerant as she bore some of the worst rutting that I can recall seeing in a film.

And doing those surfing scenes was just as challenging?

Yeah, because look at my hair. You can't go into the sea with this haircut. I had to learn to surf quickly and the situation was made harder by the gentleman teaching me to surf. He used to be with the American Special Forces and was from the US Olympic Water Polo Team, a stronger bastion of masculinity one could ever hope to meet. Being confronted with him while I was feeling so vulnerable was an enormous challenge. Heaped upon that was the necessity to learn surfing. Those were difficult hours. The results speak for themselves. I look awkward and frightened in those scenes.

The title of the film is "Forgetting Sarah Marshall." Are there relationships that you wish you could forget?

Every romantic liaison I have ever had fueled and crafted me into the great lover of romance that sits before you now. Although there has been an awful lot of pain, it is surely a price worth paying for beauty. I will endure pain for the duty that it sometimes bring. Not to say my heart hasn't frequently been broken, for it has, but now I am a much stronger gentleman, still optimistic that love can be found by all.

E-mail the columnist at rvnepales_5585@yahoo.com and read his blog, "The Nepales Report," on http://blogs.inquirer.net/nepalesreport.