Boob-tube booboos
By Nestor Torre
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 22:34:00 11/07/2008
Filed Under: Entertainment (general), Television
HOST: Congratulations on winning your award abroad!
Guest: Thank you, I was just very lucky.
Host: Oh, you’re too humble. I’m sure our viewers agree, your achievement deserves a big, round applause!
(Uh, thanks anyway. . .)
* * *
Host: What can you say to inspire young Filipino students today?
Guest: They should set high standards—they should learn to sour like birds!
(Ang asim naman.)
Good friend
Host: What do you admire most about your good friend?
Guest: I admire most of all, despite his many problems and pressure from different people, that he has remained collectively cool!
(Perhaps you mean to say, calm, cool and collected?)
* * *
Host: Your enemies accuse you of censoring what they want to say against you.
Guest: No, that’s not true, they are free to said their conflicts!
(No comment.)
* * *
Host: After your religious conversion, how different or better is your life now?
Guest: Oh, very better—I now have that peacely feeling!
(Ah, OK ...)
* * *
Host: There are so many people now dieting, but not all are doing it in a healthy way. What can you say to them?
Guests: To the dieters out there, if you’re fats, it’s time to do it slowly!
(Ano daw?)
Family problems
Host: How is your uncle doing now, after so many family problems?
Guest: He’s OK now, they’re OK now with his former daughter.
(Uh, come again?)
* * *
Host: Why do you think has this love team succeeded in the movies? What do their fans like about them?
Guest: Definitely, because they have good report with each other.
(Yes, in romantic movies, “good report” is so important.)
* * *
Host: In the light of the economic crisis, what can we do?
Guest: We can protect our savings by spending and earning less.
(The first part makes sense, but the second must be—the New Economics?)
* * *
Host: What about people who want to build their homes, should they wait or go ahead?
Guest: Since materials are going up, make sure you compare prices before you construction isang bahay.
(I-rumble niyo na lang . . .)
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