MANILA, Philippines?Host: In this controversy over sexy shots on TV and in the movies, what are some of the standards that can guide our decisions?

Guest: It?s really difficult to decide, because there?s always a thin line between pornographic and lewd.

(Ah, come again?)

* * *

Host: Congratulations on your award!

Guest: Thank you very much.

Host: How do you feel about it? Is it an inspiration for you?

Guest: Of course. I don?t expect awards, but it?s only natural, the more you call me better, the more you care with me!

(You should have stopped at ?Thank you very much.?)

* * *

Host: You?re new in show biz, and yet you?re already popular. What?s your advantage over other young talents out there?

Guest: Well, one thing, I easily get well along with all the people.

(Do tell!)

* * *

Host: What are the attractions and activities at your beach resort?

Guest: Oh, so many?swimming, diving, banana boat, underwater, snoring?

( You mean snorkeling, we presume?)

* * *

Host: Why did you get (name of starlet) to perform in your show?

Guest: Because he?s an actor, dancer and singer all in one?so, varsity talaga.

(Baka versatile ang ibig mong sabihin . . .)

* * *

Host: You have been with your boyfriend for how long now?

Guest: Four years.

Host: In show biz, that?s very long. What?s your secret?

Guest: I just think, to be in a relationship, you just have to be, like, together.

(Like, that?s what being in a relationship means.)

* * *

Host: Are you in love with (name of starlet)?

Guest: No, no, we?re just friends, really.

Host: But, you?re seen together so often.

Guests: Yes, para kaming brothers and sisters, pero walang romance.

(?Thank goodness for that!)

Institution of marriage

Host: Do you still believe in marriage?

Guest: Of course!

Host: But, the institution of marriage is less popular these days, with so many marriages breaking down.

Guest: Yes, for some, maybe?but, for me, I still believe na walang katapusan ang eternal love!

(Kaya nga eternal, ?no?)

* * *

Host: Oh, we have no more time. Say goodbye already.

Cohost: OK, from all of us out here, thank you for all watching.

(Uh, you?re welcome?)

* * *

Cohost: You naman?

Host: Yes, end na ang show for today, kasi medyo short na tayo.

(As in, vertically challenged?)