MANILA, Philippines?A source alleges that, in a yet-unreleased (thank goodness) sex video, Female Celebrity was ?violated? in a rather unconventional way.

Suffice it to say that it involved bottled water. Ouch.

In yet another video, Sweet (or so we all thought) Actress was rather aggressive in bed?recalling a rodeo rider in her acrobatic derring-do.

Secret ties

Character Actress has a secret.

She allegedly separated from her husband because of her ?close friendship? with Younger Singer.

A mole insists that CA?s youngest child looks uncannily like YS.

While we?re at it, YS?s present wife bears a disconcerting resemblance to CA, when she was younger and slimmer.

Family loan

The entire family of Controversial Celebrity is beholden to his Rich Girlfriend.

A spy swears that, after only a few months as a couple, CC borrowed P4 million from RG to save his parents from financial ruin.

Source quipped: ?No wonder CC?s family is tolerating his dysfunctional relationship with RG.?

More ties that bind

RG treated CC?s mom to a US trip, said the mole.

CC?s mom bought fake Louis Vuitton totes in Greenhills to give as pasalubong to relatives abroad. Unfortunately, US Customs officials discovered the bootleg bags and detained CC?s mom for several hours!

RG?s connections got CC?s mom off the hook, of course.

Forgotten loan

Top Producer got a million-peso loan from a government-controlled outfit.

To avoid paying, TP hooked up with Controversial Politician.

Just as quickly, TP?s loan was forgotten ... as if it was written on water, said an industry insider.

Hello, goodbye

LONDON?Scottish singing sensation Susan Boyle has considered quitting ?Britain?s Got Talent,? which brought her worldwide fame, show judge Piers Morgan said Thursday.

Morgan said the 48-year-old spinster, dubbed Hairy Angel, was struggling to cope with pressure after she reportedly unleashed a foul-mouthed tirade at the hotel where the contestants are staying.

Writing on his blog earlier, Morgan, a former tabloid newspaper editor, described Boyle as a ?frightened rabbit? and called for her critics to ?back off.? Morgan said Boyle showed the weight of expectation on her shoulders via a wobbly performance last weekend.

Boyle is bookmakers? favorite to come out on top in the BGT finals today. AFP

Got it first!

BURBANK, CALIFORNIA?It took a radio disc jockey to remind Jay Leno where he?ll stand in ?Tonight Show? history when he walks off the stage for the last time Friday.
Leno was at the wheel of one of his famous vintage cars when he heard the DJ conduct a pop quiz: Who?s the second-longest-running host of ?Tonight,? after Johnny Carson?
?The guy on the radio actually got it before I did,? Leno said Thursday, smiling.

He will have posted an impressive 17 years as ?Tonight? host, but well short of Carson?s three decades that ended with his retirement in May 1992. Leno debuted as ?Tonight? host a few days later. AP

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Top of the tabloids

The top show biz stories in PDI tabloid Bandera this week. (And why we are moved, if we are moved.)

?Boobs ni Yasmien Kurdi nagmumura sa laki. (What?as in hurling invectives?)
?Yasmien sinilipan, niyakap ni Baron Geisler. (Baron na naman?)
?Yasmien natakot daw kay Baron kaya iniurong agad ang demanda? (Take a cue from Katrina! Not the hurricane, but close, huh?)
?Nakadroga ba si Hayden sa sex video nila ni Katrina Halili? (But not too high to mount the camera!)
?Katrina-Hayden sex video binebenta ng P2M sa TV network. (For airing in full? With sponsors? Yikes.)
?Belo, Hayden pareho lang ng trip sa pakikipagtalik. (Speechless kami.)
?Katrina nagtangkang mag-suicide? (Hindi raw totoo.)
?Ina ni Hayden umaming adik ang anak. (Horrors do drip from the mouths of some moms.)
?Richard Gomez, Lucy Torres ?di nakabuo ng baby sa US. (Kasama ba ang US sa plano?)
?Bea Alonzo pinapak ni Sam Milby, nag-two-piece pa. (Sobrang eeezy!)
?Pagsu-sorry ni Hayden Kho galing sa ilong. (We just have to ask: Retouched kaya ?yon?)
?Nora Aunor uuwi sa Pinas sa 2010, eeksena sa eleksyon? (Why, where, what and how, pare?)
?Halikan nina John Lloyd Cruz at Luis Manzano pinalakpakan. (As in, ?Bravo??)
?Korina Sanchez baka uurong sa kasal nila ni Mar Roxas. (Maybe just to prolong the suspense, why not?)
?Kaso nina Hayden at Katrina mauuwi lang sa wala. (Funny, we?re starting to get that feeling. Or, mauuwi sa isang ?X? movie.)
?Derek Ramsay kay Hayden: Baka mapatay ko talaga siya! (Afraid.)
?Cristine Reyes isinusuka ng mga taga-ABS. (She?s back in the intrigues pool!)

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