DEAR EMILY,

My lady friend who is married with four grown-up children has just reconnected with her ex-boyfriend. Although it is not clear if they broke up before she got married, the gentleman remained a bachelor until this time, though he has one son from a previous relationship.

Now they are texting and e-mailing each other, with occasional phone calls. They live in different parts of the world and they have agreed to meet up someday. They still believe they will end up being together for the rest of their lives.

But my friend is in a more complicated situation because she is married.

She is determined, though, to end her marriage just for her true love. Do you think she is in her right mind?

CONCERNED FRIEND

Sure, people in love will always be right – in their own minds. And of course it’s wonderful to feel young again and stay sleepless, thinking of someone you know who is thinking of you.

They have become bolder, more daring and passionate in their language and thoughts, now that they are older. There’s also the safety of a whole barrier of seas and continents separating them. There are too many constrictions, attachments and complications to make that relationship a reality.

I wouldn’t worry about it if I were you. The fact that they are not even burning telephone lines or jumping in planes to see each other immediately or go on the sly, indicates there is no cause for alarm.

They’re just cavorting in the virtual world, feeling young and foolish again. Let them skim through their trove of memories of fun in the past. That might even help your lady friend carry through whatever is emotionally ailing her.

Sometimes it takes three to make a marriage work. They might even tire of each other before you know it. Give time, time.

E-mail emarcelo@inquirer.com.ph; Subject: lifestyle.