MANILA, Philippines ? Most expatriates will tell you that in their first year of living in their adopted country, everything seems new, exciting and exotic. Then on their second year, those same things that were once so exotic suddenly become infuriating. On the third year, the expat either adapts and starts to live like the locals, or uproots and returns home where things are more familiar and comfortable.

I belong to the group that decided to stay on. No matter where in the world one lives, the daily grind eventually kicks in, with its standard set of problems. So if life was going to be about a ?different country, same problems? cycle, then might as well select a country you really love.

I am a Francophile and love all things French. This is the main force that keeps me in France despite the political climate, the numerous strikes, the high taxes, the language barrier, the economic situation, the cost of living, and even the rude service.

Like being in a relationship, my concept of France changes the longer I stay here. There?s so much to experience, with each region offering a different patois, food and wine specialty, architecture, cultural event, and even type of French inhabitant.

France is still the Number 1 travel destination in the world, and welcomed 78 million tourists in 2006. The number of visitors worldwide is expected to double to 160 million by 2020.

That?s because there?s truth in advertising. The country has a lot going for it, including great cuisine, a beautiful language, countless cultural attractions, a superior TGV system for fast and comfortable train travel, not to mention the glamorous lure of Paris, the fashion capital of the world.

But my decision to stay in France also has a price. I?ve had to give up many comforts of living in Manila, including having my own car and driver, a household staff composed of Chris the bartender and Rowena the masseuse, weekly salon visits, and weekly trips to the spa. In Paris, a body massage costs P40,000, for a substandard result.

I also miss quality time with my family, sunning in Tali Beach and eating cold mangoes on a warm day. On some freezing mornings, I?d give anything for a traditional Filipino breakfast of tapsilog, longsilog, hot pandesal with kesong puti and crunchy corned beef. I miss wolfing down chocolate chip pancakes with lots of whipped butter, peanut butter and maple syrup from the neighborhood Pancake House. There are no American pancakes here, only crêpes. There?s no peanut butter either, only Nutella. And oh, if only I could pack with me Abiling, my late grandmother?s cook, who does laing, kare-kare, adobo and all those greasy, fatty Filipino dishes I love so much! That is, if the ingredients can somehow materialize in the local markets here, which I doubt.

So what happens if, like me, you find yourself in a foreign land surrounded by strangers and surviving on maps that you have to translate day in and day out? Well, you?d have to commit to a lifetime of integration. Learn the language no matter how long it takes, make friends with the locals, learn to cook their food, dress like them, fight like them―be them.

But never forget your roots.

For over a year, I welcomed old friends from Manila who were traveling to France for both business and personal pleasure. Keeping in touch with people from my former life helps me remember where I came from and who I was before reinventing myself over here. They remain my benchmark, so I am never really mentally lost.

Visit family when they are nearby. I?ve attended weddings and graduations around Europe, because that is precisely the strength of the EU: accessibility to all the other nations.

Do as the French do. Veer away from over-commercialized guidebooks. Eat in restaurants that have only French menus with no English translations. Check if the menu is written on a blackboard―that means it constantly changes and uses seasonal ingredients.

Learn some language basics at your local Alliance Française before coming over, to travel better within France. There are no Anglophones in most French towns. Instead of living in a generic chain hotel that looks the same everywhere in the world, try to find something more French in body and soul.

Veer away from Starbucks or McDonald?s, and try other museum offerings beyond The Louvre?s Da Vinci Code Tour. Try to visit small family-owned shops with unique handmade items instead of predictably spending all your time in the gigantic Louis Vuitton flagship store on the Champs-Elysées (you can find exactly the same products anywhere in the world). If you have friends in France, call them for their favorite neighborhood joints. Visit the local open markets and cook in your host?s house. ?

Here?s how to catch Francophilia:

1. Dine in L?Arpège, www.alain-passard.com at least once in your life.

2. Stay in Hôtel du Moulin Petit, www.paris-hotel-petitmoulin.com, which was designed by Christian Lacroix. Or, if like me, you enjoy the company of the gay community, choose Caron de Beaumarchais, www.carondebeaumarchais.com, in Le Marais.

3. Don?t forget, you?re in the fashion capital of the world. Visit The Fondation Pierre Bergé which houses the archives of Yves Saint-Laurent, www.ysl-hautecouture.com. Or visit the Musée de la Mode et du Textile, www.lesartsdecoratifs.fr, which usually has a special fashion exhibition.

4. Paris is small and it?s possible to walk and bike through the entire city. Make sure to bring a pair of your most comfortable Repettos for pounding the pavement.

5. Use the Velib? programme, where you can pick up a bike in various points of Paris and use it for a day, a week, a month or a year.

6. If you?re traveling with a girl (or gay) friend, brunch together in the rue Bonaparte Ladurée, on the second floor in particular. If you are traveling with a male friend, separate from him as he may cramp your style. Paris is for women.

7. Shop for lingerie, fragrance, hats, vintage books and magazines, home décor, the list goes on?

8. Take the iDTGV, the most progressive French train today, which allows you to select a party car (DJ booth, bar, mobile phones allowed) or a serene car (silence and tranquility). www.idtgv.com

9. When dining in a region, make sure to order wine from that region. They often go together.

10. Live in a chateau. Check out Chateau de Cassis in Provence, http://chateaudecassis.com; or Chateau Valmy in the Roussillon region, www.chateau-valmy.com. Another type of home to live in is a Maison de Maître? check out Domiane de Verchant, www.verchant.com, it?s a 17th-century estate in Montpellier.

11. Visit the numerous medieval villages and eat in an auberge.

12. Visit the French coast for great seafood and sun. Instead of the usual suspects such as St. Tropez, try Collioure or Banyuls-Sur-Mer.

13. Most tourists think that the gastronomic capital of France is Bordeaux, but the French believe that it?s Lyon.