IF Cinderella had left these footwear instead of her tiny glass slippers, do you think she?d have wound up with her Prince Charming? He would have run off, as I would, when shown these shoes so ugly I?d probably kick them under the bed just to banish them from sight:

1) UGGS. Ugh, love to hate them! Even their ads admit they are UGGLY?but comfortable and cozily warm they make everything else you wear look fabulous. So if you still plan to invest in these walking behemoths and plan to wear them outside your bedroom?remember, you?ve been warned that unless you have legs like a gazelle or Giselle Bundchen, they will make your calves look ginormous.
http://www.marieclaire.com/fashion/trends/ articles/celebrity-shoe-donts

2) Birkenstocks. The granddaddy of all comfortable shoes. Worn by the hippies back in the day when they signified a lifestyle choice. These shoes were never meant to walk the runway. So I give it 10 points for its non-pretentious earnestness and a zero for glam factor.

3) Gladiator sandals. Okay, I admit I?ve been another unwitting fashion victim who succumbed to this recent trend and spent no small amount on my Miu Miu gold glads. I wore them once, and only in the store when I tried them on?and never again. So now I?m still waiting for the Roman Orgy-themed party to whip them out. These sandals wrap around your calves and expose your toes, thus they can only be worn by well-pedicured slim-ankled 5?10? waifs or real gladiators!

http://www.audioshocker.com/2008/07/12/ seriously-ladies-stop-wearing-gladiator-sandals
4) Crayola shoes. This was an ?80s trend which, alongside shoulder pads and mullet hair cuts, deserved to die a slow painful death. These multi-colored, canvas and plastic lace up oxfords scream ?I am part of a boy/girl band, I want to be a cool rock star.? If ?wannabe? is your look, then ok, stock up on these.

5) Skyscraper heels with clear plastic instead of leather. I have seen a couple of designer versions and thought one or two may be passable. Brian Atwood has a Swarovski-studded one that deserves a second look, but the price tag alone makes it ultimately a fashion mistake! Why waste your shoe budget on plastic shoes? Because they possibly match everything and make you look like you?re wearing no shoes? Yup, while highlighting your sweaty squished feet in the process. Where?s the win in that? This shoe falls under ?concept shoe? for me?it?s a neat idea but it has yet to be executed properly. Why waste closet space on pricey prototypes!?

The following qualify as UGLY if worn with the wrong outfit and in the wrong style:

1) White pumps. Reminds me of high school graduation when the nuns at my school considered sexy heels as ?satan shoes.? So we were forced to wear ?plaster of Paris white? two-inch maximum heel, closed front pumps with our all-white (stockings included) graduation outfit. It?s a ?No pictures, please!!? look. Think comfortable nurse shoes minus the cute nursing cap. These shoes worn outside the hospital with regular clothes have a 99.9 percent chance of becoming a fashion emergency.

2) Killer platforms. They look like they belong to a cheap and confused ugly stripper. Stay away unless you want people thinking you work in a night club or are auditioning for a job there.

3) Cheap animal print shoes. Granted, these shoes did much to avoid killing exotic animals for their skin, but please consider the animals? sullied reputation as well. Any person with an ounce of good taste should know better than to wear any type of bad imitation croc, leopard, zebra, tiger, etc. skin on their feet. ?Bad imitation? is anything overly designed that clashes with everything in your wardrobe. The exception to this rule: Harajuku girls, Lady Gaga and Gwen Stefani. If you do not fall under any of these categories?beware! These are ?all or nothing? statement shoes, and if your wardrobe or lifestyle do not fit, why go there?

Finally, why am I stepping all over people?s right to choose whatever shoes they like, ugly or not?

Because there are so many amazingly wonderful and beautiful shoes out there in every price range that are guaranteed to enhance any closet, no matter how boring or spectacular. So it?s a real shame and a serious eye sore when people make the mistake of going ?over the top? and falling into bad shoe design territory or settling for unflattering shoes, no matter how comfy they are.

Granted we don?t all have the luxury of fairy godmothers providing us with pretty glass slippers for the party, but finding stylish shoes that work with one?s style and budget is so worth all the time spent searching. They may not snag us our own Prince Charming, but we can at least spare others the visual torture.

Life is too short to wear ugly shoes! So please, just pretty please, don?t do it! ?