MANILA, Philippines—Look forward to the day when you can tell yourself, “What was I thinking?”

It’s okay, you can cry. But when the tears are gone, lose the self-pity, too. It’s just too much a waste of time to dwell on the what-could-have-beens.

Sure, you’ve been hurt, and it’s not pretty. But you’re not the first to go through that. Others did and they survived.

He was not the one, obviously. Respect the fact that people change their minds, no matter what they might have told you. Even you will change your mind, too, after some time.

Maybe the universe has other plans for you. You can now concentrate on things you were supposed to do.

Spend some time alone; you will probably get to know yourself better. “Alone time” is so underrated. We do not always have to have someone with us all the time.

Allow some anger, if not hatred; it is healthy at some point. But keep your ranting short, or it will consume you and leave you bitter, and take it out on others.

Let go. Accepting the fact that it’s over is something that would unburden you.

Stop analyzing, and quit the idea cold turkey. Don’t replay events, don’t shred it bit by bit trying to find new reasons why everything happened.

It happened, period. Whoever is at fault does not matter now. What’s important is that you accept it. If you feel like you were a victim, hold it right there. You couldn’t have been a victim, unless you decided to be one.

Look forward to the day when you can laugh at all this, when you can cringe at the whole thing and tell yourself, “What was I thinking?”

Yes, it will come.