MANILA, Philippines?Talking about football in this country is like discussing Greek Philosophy on the set of ?Eat Bulaga.? You?re bound to elicit a blank stare and the evocative ?Eh??

I may as well introduce myself as a visitor from outer space whenever I bring up the Euro 2008 or the World Cup in a nation where the only team sport that matters is the one wherein you have to throw an orange rubber ball through a hoop. It is a great irony that I?ve learned to live with, the fact that my favorite sport may be immensely popular all over the world, from a cosmopolitan hub like Tokyo to a small village in Sierra Leone, yet be considered a rare, even elitist diversion in Manila. (I have yet to visit Barotac Nuevo, the town in Iloilo dubbed ?the Philippines? football capital? for its uncanny devotion to the beautiful game. When I first read about that in the news, I almost shed a tear.)

So the best thing to do is to find other such mutated, rare species aka ?The Pinoy Soccer Fan? to commiserate with. Most especially during quadrennial, historical moments of world football, such as the ongoing Euro 2008?one needs to find solace in fellow disciples, who are about as numerous in these parts as people who can explain the Nash Equilibrium in John Nash?s Game Theory.

3 o?clock habit

There are certain tactics on how to spot a devoted football fan. One way is to look for the symptoms of sleep deprivation. Red, heavy-lidded eyes, disheveled hair, clothes that look like they were put on in the dark?all these are the first outward signs of the dedicated fan, who has been watching the live matches at an ungodly hour, and like a loyal soldier, would troop to work a few hours later. I had in fact found one such specimen, and he tells of his travails:

?The main difficulty in catching international football matches here is the time these games are played. Due to the time difference with Europe, matches will begin at 10 p.m. Manila time earliest and 3 a.m. latest,? Sleepless Fan explains, still wired from two shots of espresso. ?Second, for non-annual tournaments like the Euros or the World Cup, these are only shown on pay-per view or satellite TV, so you either cough up the money or trek to the nearest bar, and only an expat bar at that.?

This year?s Euro 08 satellite feed costs P2,500, which is still cheaper than the World Cup season?s pass two years ago. Those who pay, like a good friend of mine who is still heartbroken over the Dutch defeat, believe it?s worth every cent. Ah, sweet luxury?watching the games at 3 a.m. in pajamas, ensconced in fluffy pillows and blankets, snuggled up with the wife/girlfriend, or a bottle of beer.

(Writing that last sentence, by the way, made me feel like I just sprouted chest hair.)

For the rest of us, however, it?s all about sacrifice. Says Sleepless Fan, ?Because I live in QC, I have to leave work early, drive home, sleep, wake up at 2 a.m., drive back to Makati, locate an expat bar and catch a 2:45 a.m. match. That?s devotion for you!?

Finding the ?Expat? hangouts

Those expat bars, as another friend (let?s call him Sleepless Fan # 2) explains, ?are centralized in Makati, because that?s where most expats live.? He also drives to the city from the north, but instead of leaving past midnight, he?d rather bar hop around town first to kill time before the big game.

In the hopes that there?d be other places outside Makati showing the games, I recently checked out this newly opened English pub in my neck of the woods south of the toll way. I walked in and it looked promising: Englishmen huddled over their beers, blasé about the nimbus clouds of smoke hanging about them, watching the highlights of the previous day?s Holland-Russia game. I walked over to the waitress to ask if they showed the Euro 08 live. She blinked once. Then I pointed to the TV, and asked once more. She blinked twice. ?Soccer? Meron ba?? Then she handed me a menu, saying they were closing at 11 p.m. Dammit. ?Sige, Fish and Chips nalang.?

Then of course, comes the next hurdle, the issue of cost. ?Expat bars? usually mean ?expat prices,? and for those of us who don?t earn expat salaries, that just translates to ?expensive.? Yes, that means forking out three times more than what you?d usually pay for a drink. Add all those nights up, plus the exorbitant gas prices, and you might as well have bought the Pay-per-View subscription. And a bag of chips.

?Ultimately,? concludes Sleepless Fan # 1, ?that?s why it?s hard to find other Pinoy fans?there aren?t any! And there aren?t any because there?s no chance for Pinoys to watch!?

As I type this, the upcoming scheduled match is the semi-final between Spain and Russia. Whoever wins this game goes on to the finals against Germany. Now thanks to the high ratio of good-looking players composing the Spanish team, I?ve found a few other female friends who are willing to stay up late and watch the game on a big screen at this biker bar that serves good steaks. Along with the other Sleepless Pinoy Fans, we?re going all the way to the finals.

Yes, all five of us.